Off Time

Woke up off time

Questions rattle my head

Am I better off here?

Am I better off dead?

The docs think that I’m crazy

But I don’t hear things

I just want to feel safe

Want to make it to spring

Preparing myself

The meds still don’t help

They don’t want me for money

Just to see me in hell

I can’t see the future

But I still sit on edge

Because I’ll never know

When they come for my head

I can’t breathe when I’m out

No difference when I’m in

Wish it was all just as easy

As when we were kids

Maybe it’ll be cancer?

Maybe corona or lead

They might hit me on Bancroft

Or where Collingwood bends

They don’t care for the kids

That they shoot in the streets

So why would I think

That they’d care for me?

Never meant to end up here

It just wasn’t the way

No one wants me to leave

But I know I can’t stay

Maybe I’m wrong?

Maybe just call the cops?

But the boys that they run with,

Aren’t afraid to blow tops.

Wish I hadnt scratched their shit,

The day that they pulled,

Now I don’t know-

If I’ll ever grow old.

Cause the dogs are relentless,

And there’s wolves in the streets

They’re not even hungry,

They just want me to bleed.

I don’t owe them nothing;

Not money or respect

They just fucking hate me,

So there’s a price on my head.

Now I don’t like to drink,

And I don’t wanna smoke.

I just want to escape,

Want to find a new home.

I just want to feel free,

I just want to feel calm,

And I don’t really know,

If I can keep going on.